Sunday morning

Out for a run on a Sunday morning and I realised, when there aren’t a bunch of humans out and about, intervening and making the world a noisy and busy place… the world returns to its basic nature and that is profound stillness.

ode to a friend

Dear friend, I treasure you. Because you make me feel like I’m not the only one in life with a tantruming child. Instead you show me how to sit and accept and love-in-spite-of… Because you remind me that I’m not the only one who feels like they never have their shit together.  Instead you show me that life isn’t about …

Are we progressing…or simply spiralling round and round?

 It might have started with my mother’s stories.  At night before bed, I would ask her to tell me a story about when she was little.  She would tell me about ‘pumpernickle beach’, a sandy lot where the neighbourhood kids used to play and build forts.  She would tell me about tipping backwards over the couch with her sister and …

Two things can be true

Logic, rationality, the way we often speak to one another, are all based on an assumption that only one thing can be true at a time. It is either light or dark.  It is either good or bad.  I feel either love or revulsion, energised or exhausted.  We tell each other, “I saw this.”  or “This is what happened.” or …

The 3 things I’ve learned about ‘Believing in Yourself’

My life these past few years has required a lot of faith.  A lot of believing in myself.  A lot of self-cheerleading. I am a stay-at-home mother of two little boys, and every day, almost every moment in fact, I have to make a decision about how to handle a situation with their behaviour.  These micro-decisions will compound to shape …

How to build a Home

For the last month, I’ve looked like this. Earlier this year we bought our first home.  Built in 1955, it had been a woman’s family home for the past forty years.  She and her husband had raised three children in it, and no doubt had grown themselves in it too.  The house had no central heating and ageing decor, but the first time …

Growing up is slow

What are the things that make you realise your age? When do you know that you are Grown Up? We are in the process of buying our first house, and I’ve realised, there is nothing like having a mortgage advisor and a solicitor to make you feel like an adult.  You would have thought having two children would have been …

Working Life

I’ve had a strange working life.  For the past four+ years, I have been a full-time stay-at-home mother of two boys.  Before that I have worked in as a manager of a coffeeshop, a punt tour guide in Cambridge, a yoga teacher and an academic.  And there were the years of my teaching postdoc where I spent my research time …

Antidotes and Alchemy for our thoughts

When I think of antidotes, the image that springs to mind is of an apothecary’s workshop, bottles of strangely coloured potions on dusty shelves, cures for snake venom and spider bites.  Perhaps something like this: An antidote is a substance which counteracts poison.  But what if the most poisonous thing in our life is our own thoughts?  Is there an …

How random events have determined my life…

How did I get here?? How many times have you asked yourself this question?  I suppose it could be a sign that I’m getting older, this propensity to marvel at the zigzaggy unexpected path my life has taken thus far.  More time has passed for me to do things, accomplish things, make mistakes, zigzag.  Most of the time when I …