The wisdom of creating the right boundaries at the right times with the right people has been such big work for me over the past few years.
Knowing when to say no.
Learning where I need boundaries with myself.
Getting clear about where I give my energy & time.
These things are huge and, to be honest, the wisdom is in the detail of each situation…so it’s always a challenge for me.
We can also associate boundaries with a lack of freedom. So much of what kept me stuck in “boundary-less” relationships and situations was that I really wanted to believe I had enough for everything.
Enough energy for everyone who needed it.
Enough time for everything I wanted to do.
It just never actually worked that way in real life.
Instead a lack of boundaries in a relationship would leave me depleted. And a lack of boundaries around time meant that I didn’t manage to do the things I said were most important to me.
Rivers are created by their boundaries.
Without the boundaries of the banks on either side which direct the flow of water, a river would be a flood…or a puddle.
Boundaries are what give our life its freedom.
It isn’t a freedom to be all things to all people at all times.
It isn’t a freedom to have time for every single thing you & others can put on your “to do list”.
But it is a freedom to direct the energy of your life where you choose.
I’m using this metaphor with *money * time * my energy * my attention…
I imagine that list is going to keep expanding.
Freedom is one of my highest values. My spiritual practice is centred around a deep desire to be free of my own self-created suffering. To be free of the fear, self-doubts, judgements and limiting stories that prevent me from stepping into the fullness of who I am.
And spiritual practice can happen in every area of our life — when we’re alone, when we’re at work, when we’re managing our money, when we’re in our families, when we’re out with friends…
What area of your life could use stronger banks of the river? Where do you need clearer boundaries so you can direct the flow of energy where you most want it to go?
Would love to hear how this resonates…